Love Is A Shape

Over the past year I’ve had the privilege of illustrating “Love Is A Shape,” written by Kate Hoefler. The vague mass of preliminary art came together while I was pregnant with my son, and took its final form while I was newly postpartum. Growing a baby introduced another layer to an already emotional art-making process, and as a result it’s hard to separate my feelings towards “Love Is A Shape” from my feelings towards a very nauseous, energy-sapped marathon of a pregnancy.

“Love Is A Shape” was a dream project on every front, with extra points for a respected publishing house, trusting art-director, and beautiful text. As I worked, I saw a hopeful yet timid 18-year-old Audrey recently admitted to a college illustration program, dreaming of one day drawing for projects like “Love Is A Shape.” It was surreal from start to finish. 

I was on a high from the moment I first read the text. But after signing the contract, the high came crashing down. A pit formed in my stomach and I slowly metabolized the scale of the task ahead. The scariest part of art-making is the beginning; when your ideas are raw and formless, and there’s nothing tangible to look at. In talking with other illustrators, this feeling is common (especially with dream projects). I think I’ll always feel a mixture of intense joy and terror when beginning a book project.

While my actual process passed in a blur, I can now look back without the distortion of my nauseous-and-pregnant glasses and confidently identify some highlights and regrets. In true art-critique fashion, let’s start with the highlights:

1. “Love Is A Shape” has a great cover. In my humble opinion, illustrating a book cover is terrifying. You have to both accurately summarize and portray the general vibe of the book while not revealing too much as to give away the entire plot (but just enough to tantalize the customer to pick it up and read it, rather than the book sitting next to it). The cover was the last image I created for the book, so by the time I got around to it, I had enough ideas and felt sufficiently warmed up that it didn’t feel so scary.

2. I love the color scheme. Color is very important to me, and I wanted it to be a leading voice in “Love Is A Shape.” Before starting, I whittled my tools down to a small(er) pile of colors I thought worked well together.

3. The hand-written typography was really fun to make, and compliments the illustrations nicely. The title on the book’s cover and title page, as well as the “Echo’s” on the canyon page were both drawn on Procreate (I cannot for the life of me figure out how illustrators have the confidence to hand-letter directly onto their drawings).

Now for the regrets:

1. I didn’t nail down the characters’ faces in the line-art phase, resulting in a lot of correction and digital noodling afterwards. Lesson learned.

2. I naively didn’t keep a record of exactly which paints I used for each characters’ skin tones and clothing. At the time, I felt confident I could match color intuitively. Until I actually tried it.

3. If I made a mistake, or was unhappy with how something was developing in my art, I’d tell myself “I’ll just fix it digitally.”

I learned a lot while illustrating “Love Is A Shape” and feel both proud and horrified at the idea of it being out in the world. Seeing your work enter the world feels a bit like dropping your child off at Kindergarten (something I haven’t quite experienced yet). You watch them walk away, hoping for the best, but know you’re ultimately powerless in how others will experience them. In that spirit, I’d like to introduce you to my latest children’s book, “Love Is A Shape.”

“Love Is A Shape” is a tender celebration of the many different forms of love children feel throughout childhood; love for a pet, love for a sibling, love for a place, and even grief– which though painful– is also love. The book feels soft and nostalgic, like childhood in general. The text is a beautiful rhyming poem with a final line that echoes after closing the book. 

Kate Hoefler, the author, is a sensitive soul who cares deeply for underrepresented groups of people, so I was conscious of her desires to include people who might otherwise not see themselves in children’s books. In that vein, the question that guided my artistic choices was: “What if single mothers were well-supported?” Children’s books idealize so much– careers, towns, history, family-life, traditions– why not idealize a family’s support-system? While prudently representing an entire group of people is never a clear-cut task, I hope readers can discern my intentions and close the book thinking about how they can better support the single-parents in their own lives.

“Love Is A Shape” will publish December 22nd, and will be available anywhere books are sold. If you feel so inclined, grab a copy for yourself and a friend. Love is the topic of the best art, prose, and music, and amidst our modern abundance is the one thing we truly need more of.