This post is a continuation of my semester-by-semester overview of my grad-school program. If you're not caught up on the other posts, I recommend reading them before continuing:
1. Observation and Experiment: https://www.audreygraceart.com/post/my-grad-school-experience
2. The Sequential Image: https://www.audreygraceart.com/post/the-sequential-image
After “The Sequential Image,” we flew home for Christmas break where we bounced between parents’ houses. Living out of a suitcase was starting to feel like a permanent condition. With a few weeks of time on my hands, I began to stew over what subject-matter and process I would settle into as an artist. I asked myself:
Which mediums feel like play?
What subject matter feels so completely and utterly indulgent to me?
Which illustrators am I jealous of because they’re unabashedly making my dream work?
With these questions, I started experimenting with gouache, a medium I previously loathed (don’t treat gouache like oil paint folks). As I painted, I fell in love with both the versatility and constraints of the medium. It can become opaque like acrylic, or glassy like watercolor. It can be layered, re-worked, or lifted. Gouache paint can bleed spontaneously and cut precisely. In short, it’s the perfect medium for traditional illustration.
I also reminisced on my subject-matter of choice as a little kid. What subject matter feels so completely and utterly indulgent to me? The answer was easy; horses. Flipping through my childhood art, my doodles were almost exclusively mermaids, fairies, grocery store displays (for whatever reason), and horses. I even found a card I made my cousin congratulating her on her baptism, complete with a doodle of her and her dad– as horses– in the baptismal font.
As for the illustrators I’m jealous of, I watched their painting videos, read their blog posts, and poured over their children’s books. Among them were Carson Ellis (of course), Julia Sardá, Alice and Martin Provensen, Štěpán Zavřel, Felicita Sala, Rebecca Green, and Raquel Catalina. I tried to infuse my experiments with their playfulness and expertise. Painting with gouache over Christmas break was the simplest, most satisfying pleasure.
• • •
While in the previous module we focused on bringing our observational drawings to life through a story, "The Paradox" was to help us focus our work on a specific audience. Before starting our projects, we had to identify the age range of the children we were writing for, and start thinking about our work with a more commercial mind.
My memories of “The Paradox” are especially blurry. Once I’d adjusted to the expectations and rhythms of The Cambridge School of Art, the days ticked by in a predictable flurry of kitchen table work sessions, critiques, and revisions. We started the module in the clutches of the dark and dreary British winter months (Does anybody actually like February?). My husband and I moved into a mother-in-law apartment close to the center. Our new twenty-minutes-from-downtown walk felt luxurious after biking from Impington the previous term.
For each module project, we create a “Project Proposal,” where we outline our creative goals and make a plan for our work. Mine read:
“My theme is gratitude for your life. My book follows a little country girl named Harper who learns she loves her life when she makes a halfhearted attempt to run away to the city. I
want this project to capture the feeling of yearning for a life you don’t have, and gratitude
for the one you do.”
My favorite children’s book growing up was easily “Fanny’s Dream,” by Caralyn and Mark Buehner. They tell a Cinderella-like story of a sturdy farm girl who dreams of one day going to a ball and marrying a prince. When the town mayor announces he is throwing a grand ball, Fanny is convinced her time has come. She puts on her best calico dress and goes out to the garden so she'll be ready when her fairy godmother arrives. When she never comes, something much better happens. “Fanny’s Dream,” together with my childhood horse drawings inspired my project for "Illustrator and Audience: The Paradox."
“Harper’s Home” depicts a girl who dreams of living in the city and painting her nails, wearing lipstick, and catching taxis. She falsely believes that life in the city would somehow make her happier than her parents’ old farm. One night, she saddles her horse and takes off. She climbs the nearby mountain and looks down at the sparkling city. Dazzled by the lights and splendor, she turns around and looks down on her parents’ small town. She sees the orchard, her elementary school, and other spots which spur warm memories of how good her life really is. She resolutely turns around and makes it home just before morning chores.
Many kids fantasize about running away. They pack a sandwich and some Oreos, but can never seem to make it past the end of the driveway. "Harper's Home" was my attempt at depicting this nostalgic moment.
Corbin and I biked past this haystack, which ended up in the first spread.
My very professional read-aloud of the final dummy book.
My story received mixed feedback. Many people thought she should have entered the city, seen that not all that glitters is gold, and then turned around. To me, that felt like leaving the driveway, which I wanted to avoid.
I thought it’d be interesting to include the final feedback I received for my project. I won’t mention who wrote it, but I can assure you he’s a supremely intimidating artist:
“The major strengths in your work here are your strong sense of the dynamics of page design and your assured use of chosen media. You have a good command of colour too, mixing carefully to achieve subtle, pleasing harmonies and ranges. However there are various other aspects of your work, and this project in particular, that could be given more attention: be careful of glib stylistic characterisation- when your figures are not in close-up, they can be captivating (the opening spread of the girl on the haystack is really atmospheric). But your close-ups are stiff and lacking in ‘life’ – they feel like any one of a thousand contemporary illustrators who take this road. If you are creatively ambitious, and keen to ‘stand out from the crowd’, I strongly recommend that you work hard on a bit of deconstruction here. Try filling page after page with loosely drawn doodles of characters until some of them seem to come to life – then develop those further.
In terms of the overall structure and content of Harper’s Home, the theme of ‘all that glitters is not gold’ is a well-trodden path. That’s fine (it is often said that there are only seven stories in the world), but the transformation from ‘treasure-seeker’ to ‘home bird’ happens too early and too easily to give any suspense. It’s a kind of ‘character runs away to seek gold - character has a quick look and goes home’ story. The minute she sets eyes on the city she turns around and heads home. The narrative needs a problem that she struggles to solve.
The sketchbook contains some good research but there is little or no development of the main character. My advice for the remainder of the course is this- be braver! You won’t lose the skills that you already have- they will still be there. There is nothing to lose by pushing yourself harder into experimentation.”
Though not perfect, I enjoyed making “Harper’s Home.” Stylistically, I was just dipping my toes into my current process. Looking back on it, I see the reason in my final critique. Though my characters looked commercial and my shapes were timid, it was an important project for me and brought me closer to where I want to go. Maybe I’ll give “Harper’s Home” another go in the future. It feels like the beginning of a meaningful story.
Thanks for reading!
Comments